Small and Large ---
We Negotiate Every Day! (click2tweet)
The goal is to make sure people get what they need. Which, ironically, is not always what they want or ask for. Negotiation can help both parties get the things they need while pushing unneeded elements to the side. Even if only for a little while --- pushing non-issues to the side can help secure a winning negotiation for both sides.
It's not about ME winning and YOU losing. At least it shouldn't be.
We Negotiate Every Day! We negotiate with our kids, our spouses, our peers, and our managers.
For Example,
- Kids - when will they be home, when will they do their homework, etc.
- Colleagues & Peers - Life is all about Give & Take. Working with colleagues and peers is very much about Give & Take. They don't have to work with you. Help them to want to.
- Managers and Employees - At work in your organization there are hierarchies. But, that doesn’t mean people cannot stand up for themselves and seek to negotiate.
- Business Partners - In a similar way there is a working relationship with business partners where you do not have direct control over their time, commitments and deliverables.
Kati also delivered a great 10 Guiding Principles talk at the Microsoft WPC.
If you missed them click the links above
Negotiation is a Two Way Street
By definition a negotiation should be a dialogue.
In the points above … remember … you are in the conversation too.
- What will you do … when your kids follow up with their commitments?
- What will you do … when your colleagues do what you requested?
- What will you do … when your manager or employees achieve their goals?
- What will you do … when your business partners abide by their agreements?
These are things you can negotiate.
When we get to The Final Word below we'll talk about that.
Just remember … We Negotiate Every Day!
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The IAMCPWIT community is part of the IAMCP organization. Join Us!
Together we work with women AND men to help everyone stay involved, connected and engaged in WIT efforts.
The next IAMCPWIT webinar is with Microsoft’s Ron Huddleston … register today.
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Continued …
Below are the detailed notes from Kati’s presentation. You can hear it in her voice here.
Women Lead with Connection (click2tweet)
Women are more empathetic and sympathetic to the situation, the space, the people in the room, sometimes even the people on the phone (how close do you sit to the microphone or video camera?)
What are the Top 5 things to keep in mind?
Pro Tip: Secret to Success … Think about the other person
Consider BATNA too
1. Don’t ask for one thing at a time
For example,
Lay them all out …
Why? So you don't wear them out and wear them down.
For example,
- Ask 1 - I have a vacation coming up. Can I take that off?
- Ask 2 - I have a spring commitment to my kids. Can I leave every day at 4pm?
- Ask 3 - I take my kids birthday off and spend the day with them. Can I take those days?
Red Flag! The person being asked is now worn down and less likely to say yes.
Better:
Put them all together and say … I have a few things on my calendar that I want to make you aware of and get you agreement on.
2. Have Options
The goal is the get a good deal … not just get a deal.
3. Good Negotiation Takes Practice
Most people aren't born with the natural gift to negotiate.
If you are one of these people … great.
For the rest of us … practice, practice, practice.
You need to build up those muscles
4. Using Questions for Clarity
- Consider … The Five Why's
Asking questions to insure you understand what it being requested is not only smart it also shows you are paying attention.
Mistakes to Avoid
Practice, Practice, Practice
Just like the answer to the age old question … "How do I get to Carnegie Hall?"
The answer is the same … Practice, Practice, Practice.
Getting Your Attitude and Mindset Right
- This is what building that muscle allows
- You know what you might encounter … or at least you may have considered 80% of the possible scenarios
5. Curve Balls Happen
It's Ok to say …
- I'm not prepared to talk about this yet.
- -or-
- Can I ask you a few questions to make sure I understand your intent?
If you aren’t ready for a particular situation … it’s OK to say so and/or ask clarifying questions.
Personal Exercise -
Do this on your own time
But, do it!
One thing to consider is … Ask a friend.
- Ask them … what do you think? How would you approach this?
- This is not to put them in the middle of it. Rather to get their perspective and insights.
Takeaway – A Great Cheat Sheet
Chock full of reminders and primers to get you thinking, remembering, and negotiating.
Final Word!
COUNTER
The point is … Don't Accept What People are Offering at face value. (click2tweet)
For example, if someone says …
Can you do X … and it's more than you think you can do.
Counter with Y.
There is no shame in countering.
It means the person has
- Thought about the ask
- Considered alternatives
- Considered what they could do
There you have it. Kati Quigley’s thoughts on Negotiation.
Thank you for the reminder and tips for when We Negotiate Every Day!
Thank you Kati for your insights. We look forward to what you will share with us next.
Listen to the webinar here.
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For more information about the IAMCP and IAMCPWIT efforts click on the links or ask me.
Also, you can connect with the IAMCP WIT US lead Beth Burell or the IAMCP WIT Global Chair, Christine Bongard,
The first meeting is always free … find one in your area. Join the LinkedIn of Facebook groups and at a minimum … subscribe to the newsletter.
Here is the Oct 2017 IAMCPWIT newsletter
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I am a a contributing author to Entrepreneur, Elite Daily, Yahoo, US News and to the Personal Branding Blog with over 250 articles published.
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